behind all these ...



is it just me ... or is it something that's just not place right ...
something is definitely bothering ... but i just dun exactly know what's wrong ...
maybe it's just me and my paranoid tots ... "FEAR" is the word ...

if only i'm able to shut it ... and dun try to dig it ... i'm sure it's gg to go away ...
shld i 'head on'? ... i dun know really ... it might cause unnecessary mishaps ...
shld i stick to my belief? shld i just listen to my heart and stop tinking for once?

i wish i have answers for all the questions in my head ...
or i shld not have questions and doubts ... and shld ignore those voices ...
ARggHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Comments

  1. whatever it is, these words are sometimes the whispers within that may harm you...just be careful yah and take care...

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  2. precisely ... semakin di cuba pekakkan telinga ... semakin kuat bisikannya ...
    sighh!!! tak leh angkat!!!
    tinggal nak breakdown je ...

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  3. sometimes, it is better to breakdown..at least that is a healthy practice..dari terpendam sendiri and just listen to those whispers....

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  4. tul jgk ... but will the whispers go away?? i really doubt it will kan?

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  5. hmm that one eh..i think they are possible to go away..it is just a matter of time...

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  6. when ALL questions have it's ANSWERS ...
    biler SEMUA soalan terJAWAB ...

    shitty!

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  7. must have faith that all will be answered...

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  8. u cant ignore those voices ... the harder u try the louder it gets ... maybe u shd 'take a peek' ... or ask if in doubt ... its matter of getting the 'rest' u deserve ... (",) ... then, ask wisely ...

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  9. the pluck out the courage to face it and ask ... to yg payah ...
    no matter how wise your questions may sound to you ... it may not always be for others ...
    and honestly i'm tired ... tired of going thru' yet again the same process ... but with a different being ...
    just too tired ... too tired to put my tots together ... to tired to 'fight' ...

    that's the reason why i usually chose to keep mum ... like the saying says ... "do not disturb the sleeping dragon" ... (hmmm ... is there such a saying?? ... mcm ingat2 ade gitu ... heheheh)

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  10. the pluck out the courage to face it and ask ... to yg payah ...
    no matter how wise your questions may sound to you ... it may not always be for others ...
    and honestly i'm tired ... tired of going thru' yet again the same process ... but with a different being ...
    just too tired ... too tired to put my tots together ... to tired to 'fight' ...

    that's the reason why i usually chose to keep mum ... like the saying says ... "do not disturb the sleeping dragon" ... (hmmm ... is there such a saying?? ... mcm ingat2 ade gitu ... heheheh)

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  11. thot its suppose to b tiger? .. LoL ... (",)

    anyhoo ... i tink u'd betta take a break & find ways to reach ur innerself ... calm ur thots & ur whole system first ... selagi benda berkecamuk dlm kepala otak kiter nie, selagi tu apa aje yg kiter buat akan jadi masalah ...

    *inhale ... exhale ... inhale ... exhale*

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  12. *inhaling ... exhaling ... inhaling ... exhaling*

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  13. It is normal to be fearful of the unknown, we all do because we are fearful of being harmed. It is a natural instinct that we want to avoid harm, but: Does fear exist in order to harm us or are we the creator of fear which could harm us? If you are fearful of something that could genuinely hurt you then your fear is genuine but if you are fearful of the unknown, and you think it could harm you, in this instance, fear could be explained as a result of unsettled mind. When you can't find explanation to your worries, eventually that worries become fear. Thus it is important to know your worries, before it becomes fear.

    To combat your fear you have to learn to embrace it first. Usually fear is created when you have unsettled problems which then become worries and consequently you lost your rationality to fear. Some worries are necessary and some are not. The unnecessary worries create sense of fearfulness, while the necessary worries could make you stronger and make you more determine to fight obstacles. Recognised your worries, acknowledged your problems and you will find there is no room for fear. Try and think about the solutions, not the problems. If you could find yourself doing this, you are in control again, and eventually fear will vanish.

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  14. dila ni kan ... mcm wati swimming in the deep ocean (padahal tak tau swim) ... and she caught me w/ a big net ... cause she knows i will eventually stray and eaten by those big fishes ... so before i go straying away ... there is she ... CAUGHT me and BROUGHT me back to shore ...

    errrr ... wat a tragic story ... but good ending ... wakakakakak

    so ... the moral of the story again??! ...
    (1)identify my worries - necessary? unnecessary? :: tough one but possible to be done ... NEXT -->
    (2)acknowledged my problems ... hahahaha ... the problem is ME!!! duhhh ... shld i end ME? kasi problem je ... ishhhh ...
    let me tink how to handle that problem ... maybe i look at the next one ... NEXT -->
    (3)tink about the solutions ... ok ok ... problem tak nak tink first ... tink abt the solutions ... hmmm ... then i shld skip (2) and go to (3) ... errrr "brain freeze" jap ...

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  15. hahahha.... hold that thoughts. I'll come back to you.

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  16. still holding ... it's still on freeze ...

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  17. wow .... here is some hot tea to warm you up.

    You said that the problem is you. That is a good start of identifying the problem but you cannot end the problem by ignoring it. However, the problem can be solved and sense of fear can be controlled.

    The problem is there for you to solve and since you acknowledged that the problem is ‘you’, now you need to identify it and once it has been identified, think about the solutions and not the problem.

    Worrying about the problems would not make you feel any better. Likewise, in your case you worry about the problematic ‘you’. The problematic ‘You’ could be the extremely loving, friendly, and selfless person but the problematic ‘You’ could also be the insecure, confused, and frustrated person. I think the problem is not really ‘you’ but it is in fact the strong sense of insecurity in you.

    You are probably feeling very insecure or fearful of the unknown, since you are struggling to find answers (solutions) to your questions (problems). But it is important to know that you cannot find answers to your questions when you have not identified the real problems. Thus, such confusion have resulted to, you feeling extremely frustrated about the situation. In other words, you feel confused and frustrated because everything seems to be out of reach and out of context and there is just no explanation or help. Silently you also criticised yourself for unable to solve the problem. You need to put negative emotions aside and not punished, blamed or criticised yourself anymore. Instead you could start focusing on the solutions. When you are able to do that, then you are ready to solve the problems.

    When you are ready to solve the problems, below is the list of my suggestions. Hope it helps.

    Your focus was: Questions need to be answered.
    My Suggestion: Carefully identify the problems that need to be resolved

    Your wants were: “I want to shut it,” and “don’t want to try to dig it”, “want it to go away”
    My Suggestions: Solve the problems by opening up not shutting it; you need to know what is behind it and dig it up and you want to embrace it; not run away.

    Your fear was: “Should I head on? There could be unnecessary mishap.”
    My Suggestions: Should you move on? What are the consequences of your actions? There are always consequences of one’s actions. Think about your actions and the possible consequences.

    Your solutions were: “stick to my belief, listen to my heart and stop thinking for once.”
    My Suggestions: This is important because you need to believe in yourself. You need to feel secure about yourself. Think about what you really want, what you want to do and not what others want or what others think.

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  18. ok ... my brain in melting a tiny weeny bit ... hehehehe

    jackpot!!! you got there ...

    isn't INSECURITY a bombastic word ... where does it come from? why shld this word even exist? duhhhh ... it's a killer mechanism ... ouch!

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  19. uuuhhh kkkk ... i'm kind of ready ... kind of k ... not totally committedly ready ... but sort of ...

    here goes ...
    1. i've yet to find the root cause of the problem ... it may just be me and my insecurity and my paranoia ... nothing else ... but again thr's always a BUT ... there might be other causes that i've yet to unveil ... unhide ... (if there is any that is ...)

    2. tough to open up ... KIV dulu k ...

    3. RIGHT ON!!! mishap ... takut seh if the consequences of my doing cos MAJOR mishap ... nanti jadi salah me jgk yg open up that can of worms ... BUT again the BUT thing ni eh ... it may be a good one like ian said ... talk things out it might turn bad in phase 1 but it gets better phase after phase ... I will deeply put it to thought and consider ...

    4. me being me ... 95% i always put others before myself ... and as such i always end up hurting ... cos i listen to my heart ... and tat's where my brain freezes ... and i move to the rhythm of where my feet feels right at ease ... cos it's easier to console oneself than others ... it's easier to make oneself belief than others ... it's easier to encourage oneself than others ... pendek kata senang nak pujuk diri sendiri dari others ... kan? kan? kan? ...

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  20. Anything that can put a human's spirit down can make you feel insecure. It is a strong word but you hear this word all the time. Everyone will experience insecurity at some stage of their life. Most people want to feel secure so that harm can be avoided. But the irony thing is that there is no such thing as security. Life is insecure.

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  21. Do you feel unappreciated?

    Do you love yourself as much as you love others?

    Do you feel like others are controlling your life?

    These could be the root caused of insecurity.

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  22. so i'm perfectly normal after all ... tot i always have this in me ... awaiting to erupt ... but i guess it's norm huh ...

    cos i always tot in most cases ... life is secure ... heheheh

    *smiles*

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  23. oh yeah of course you are normal. It is those who expect life to be a smooth road, and do not expect any bumpy road ahead, they will find difficulties when they encountered it.

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  24. 1. thankfully i do get appreciation ... especially for the past mths and now ... much more than i usually does ...

    2. hmm ... tough one there ... i love others more than myself ... honestly ...

    3. nope ... i do have my own wants and needs ... they can NEVER make me a controlled robot ... hahahah ... not more than 20% of what they could ... heheheh

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  25. tat's a different one isn't it?
    Life is never straight ... there are bumps here and there at times ... they are split paths in fact ...

    tat i expect ...

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  26. that is good then. you dont have much problem to worry about. In fact you are blessed to be surrounded by love. Perhaps focusing on your needs could improve your situation.

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  27. dil .. U DID IT AGAIN!!!
    know what?? it's like a block of "rubbish" has just cleared my brain ... i physically cld feel it reading ur reply ... (but now mcm pening pala lakkk ... ishhhhh)

    thanks Dila ... thank you!!!

    i'll do jus tat for now ... maybe that's the real problem or one of the many problems ... me not getting my needs ... hahahaha ... funny how it sounds ...

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  28. actually it is much of a relief to me to hear that; at least I know that you are not feeling hopelessness. when one feel there is no more hope, then there is something to really work on. And the good thing is you want to see improvement in life.

    Pening kepala pasal banyak sangat information...pergi minum tea give you some caffeine kick.

    Alright then... take it easy cookie.

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  29. hahaha ... it's open up session ... brain freeze ... brain melts ... now flooded ... heheheheh

    guess when you gets older ... u expect more in life ... and of a better quality one that is ...

    i will dear ... gonna make myself tea now ...
    you have a good evening ya ...
    cos i'm definitely gonna have a blast ... *smiles*

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