JusMoi ... My lif3sT0ry ...

can somebody please stop the clock ... time past soooo fastttt ... ni dah end of thursday daaahhhh ... arghhhh ... cepat nah masa berjln ... stoppppp!!!!!

mulut?? ... mulut manusia agi ... mane leh diam kan?? bak kata pepatah ... "...kerana mulut badan binasa..." "...kerana mulut jugak ape2 leh jadi..." kerana mulut jgk war is created ... and indeed he has declared war ... it may have started ... it may not have sound nor picture ... but it sure is there ... we'll just see how it's gonna end ... if someday one day we bump into each other ... we'll see who hides under who ... i shall not hide cos i owe him NONE ... not becos i have someone backing me up ... the last thing we need is mulut busuk org to cos rift ... when things have been quieten down for many many mths why now ... TAK FAHAM LANGSUNG!!!

looking back to Y2004 ... this is what i've done ... <my story in netfirms is gone ... but below is a glimpse of it> the year wasn't too bad ... rather memorable ... well there are tears no doubt ... catch up with Rudy had a drink at Mt Faber ... had myself a slice of cake at Singapore Yatch Club ... watch Polar Express alone ... had my ear cartilage pierce (but it's close now ... pain siakkk!!)     Y2005 ... i was in " DEAD " zone ... it was the day when i just wanted to end my lovely life ... but thank god i'm still sane and till day i'm still alive ... it's all written here ... http://jusmoi.blogspot.sg/2005/12/my-day.html   (pre-birthday blues) http://jusmoi.blogspot.sg/2005/12/it-still-my-day.html   (the day goes on) http://jusmoi.blogspot.sg/2005/12/that-it-for-my-day.html   (the day ends ... my life live) http://jusmoi.blogspot.sg/2005/12/my-day-continues-next-and-final-day.html   (the finale)   Y2006 ... to date ...

my first email wish came from ... JobsDb ... THANK YOU!!! my great source for work ...   i know there are others who remembers ... my syg D ... who just remember 3dec ... not able to get that erase from him ... faridah ... she remembers since she ask if i want to help kendarat on sat (day b4 my bd she said) my mum ... she mention that when we saw the ad royal cakes ... my elder sis ... when i ask her abt royal cakes ... (but she's more keen into knowing if i want that for my engagement ... duhhhh) jessica ... probly cos my date is the same as her aunt who went korea w/ her ...   we'll see abt it ... maybe this year is afterall a wake up year ... when last yr is my "dead" year ...   yet to decide wat to do for my day ... but one thing for sure i want to spend happy times w/ him ... i might want to ' pop up the qns' to him too ... (should i?? ... all i need is a date ... leh kan?)

ye lah ... ujung2 thn confirm mesti sakit nya ... november december ari sakittttt ... and it's gonna stay for a while ... couple of days tops ... last yr pun gitu ... http://jusmoi.blogspot.sg/2005/12/koff-koff-koff.html arghhh!!! cold!! head spinning!! heavy eyelids!!! fingers froze!! throat itch!!! arghhhh ...

my heartiest thanks to RAI  who's been my pillar all these while ... IAN who gave me inspiration and will from the stories and tots that she shares ... and lastly to DILA who never fails to let me see the light ... becos of u gals ... ur contributions to my previous entry http://jusmoi.blogspot.sg/2006/11/behind-all-these.html  ... ur valuable comments ... u have help me to take tat tiny step further to face my problems ... it gives me courage to walk with my heads up ... put my fears aside ... and move head on tactfully ... alhamdulilah ... i manage to have it trash out ... watever that need to be said has been said ... wat need to be heard has been heard ... questions has been answered ... doubts has been cleared ... for now ... it's to hold on ... hold hands and move forward ... no doubt i still smell fear (aka insecurity) in me ... it will be there for a while till i get it locked up ... but i'm pretty sure i'm stronger ... and i make sure i dun have ...

we were at the Singapore Motorshow 2006 last Saturday ... spent half of the day seeing cars and babes ... more cars and more babes ... not forgetting a memorable and never-to-be-missed stunt show by Russ Swift ( http://www.russswift.co.uk/ ) ... the guy who holds Guinness World Records ... check out his website ... we get the chance to see his stunt ... the SGD$10 admission is all worthwhile ... mane kan tidak ... after the show we get to test ride in the subaru WRX ... poweerrrr gileerrrr!!!! mcm naik roller coaster .. TOKYO DRIFT in the making ahhh .... (if only that can be captured ... but all we got are pics to share ... enjoi!!!)

A continuation of http://jusmoi.blogspot.sg/2006/11/the-verdict-will-soon-be-told.html  ... the stories continued ... phew!! done!! thank god all goes well ... hands are shaken ... hellos are exchange ... stories are told ... all comfy where they are ... all aware of what's going on ... faces seen ... approved ... accepted ... discussed ... agreed ... Let's move on ... the next hurdle gonna be tougher ... but tawakal ... redha ... believe ... be convinced ... insyaAllah ... all will work out find ... let it be fine ... not sure when ... but it sure gonna be soon ...

(translate: "do you want to drink tea?") after having my brain freeze ... unfreeze ... melt ... flooded ... i'm now enjoying a cup of Lipton Herbal Infusions - Cranberry, Raspberry & Strawberry ... w/o sugar w/o milk ... powerrrrr!!!! the smell of it is so intoxicating ... drinking it hot agi ... ahhhhh ... i'm set to refresh ... what are you machos and babes having now? ... 45mins counting down to end my work week ... yipppeeee!!!!

A continuation of http://jusmoi.blogspot.sg/2006/11/yeah.html  ... it's time!! the time tat i've been waiting for ... but why is it i felt so unsure ... guess it's just my negative tots running amok ... i need to clear my mind ... pleaseeee ... "Ya Allah!!! Give me strength ... sesungguhnya hambamu ini lemah ..." the storm shld not come ... let it be calm ... if it's meant to be ... let it be ...

is it just me ... or is it something that's just not place right ... something is definitely bothering ... but i just dun exactly know what's wrong ... maybe it's just me and my paranoid tots ... "FEAR" is the word ... if only i'm able to shut it ... and dun try to dig it ... i'm sure it's gg to go away ... shld i 'head on'? ... i dun know really ... it might cause unnecessary mishaps ... shld i stick to my belief? shld i just listen to my heart and stop tinking for once? i wish i have answers for all the questions in my head ... or i shld not have questions and doubts ... and shld ignore those voices ... ARggHHHH!!!!!!!!!

ard this time last year ... i do have ideas of what i want to do on that day ... but strangely tis year ... i wasn't tinking much abt it ... why eh? ... maybe becos this yr it's a different yr ... again not getting my hopes too high ... i shld giv it some tot ... what i want to do? where i want to go? what i want? hmmm ... better start tinking huh ....

yup ... has been waiting for this very day ... it finally came ... hopefully it clears most doubts that i wld have all these while ... the next hurdle that i've been waiting to jump on ... but just waiting for the right time ... now's the time ... glad it finally came ... u wldn't have guess the relief i had ... though it gives me the chill ... but still I'm more glad than anything ... i wun get my hopes too high ... but i'm sure i'm getting there ... phew!!! the story continues http://jusmoi.blogspot.sg/2006/11/the-verdict-will-soon-be-told.html